Darling, you’re not incompetent or an inconvenience. You’re unlearned in an area somebody thought you were exceedingly skilled, but that’s okay. It isn’t a big issue. Ask for needed space or time. Depending on the demand, there may be a way to learn a skill and utilize what knowledge you do or do not have in other areas. Please, don’t demoralize yourself because of a minor setback. Instead, prepare yourself for a significant incline as you continue to build and set yourself up for greatness.
Darling, regardless of how you feel in the moment or what you think might happen; you’ll still have to show up and do the work! If not for yourself, then for those who are or will continuously encounter you. Think ahead. Yes, there will be days where you won’t be able to stand- those are rare, but it happens, and that’s okay. However, the rest of your days - you’ll have to deny yourself, analyze your feelings, face yourself, and deal with your past happenings because you deserve to let it go.
Darling, you are enough. You have always been enough.
Darling, the world isn’t ready for what you have prepared for them. Please take it in. This is the moment you’ve been waiting for. Go out there and show them who you are and what you’re contributing to society’s narrative, regardless of if they’re in awe or disgust. You showed up and showed out. And honestly…that’s all that matters!
Darling, you can take up as much space as you need and want to. There’s enough room in this life for everyone to be comfortable. Don’t dim your light, minimize your presence, or shrink your essence. The world needs you to wake up, speak out, show up, and be present - just as you are. No mask or pretending. Just you. Beloved, all you need to do is step up and step out on faith into your role and position as your beautiful, genuine, talented, intelligent, authentic, and perfect self. You got this!
Darling, I know you love to be comfortable in life. However, you won’t be able to stay in that same stance or position forever, unfortunately. Regardless of your circumstances or situations, your personal growth will force you to move! You’ll have to get up, get out, get over, or get back. You’ll have a few moments where you’ll be able to stay still, rest, and remain where you are. But, remember, you’re still going to have to move afterward.
Darling, Don’t count yourself out when you know you’ve earned and have always deserved the role, position, title, support, and resources you’ve accumulated over time. You deserve to win too!
Darling, don’t forget you’re allowed to invest in yourself just as much as you invest in everyone else.
We need to stop being afraid of talk about our tragedies and hardships. We’re not looking for sympathy from folks. No, we’re looking to help others and allow them to know they’re not alone. Everyone has been through and are currently going through something. Doesn’t matter how big or how small a situation or circumstance may be. They are all valid, they are all important, and they all need a word in order to get through them. Our successes and failures can be an example of experience for the next person. Our words of encouragement, wisdom, experience, and even our projections and opinions can change people’s lives. You get to choose if it is for good or bad. You get to choose who and what you listen to and do with the information. Stop trying to censor and silence people from sharing their truth and perspective. You don’t have to like or agree with it. You just get to know what it is. If the government can bombard us with their agendas and propaganda every day - with millions consciously and unconsciously accept it. How much more so, could the average man do the same for each other? Speak and let your voice be heard, regardless.
Daddy, I thought of you today. And, for a split second, I smiled. I smiled because I remembered you as you were. I was reminded of why I loved you so much. For the first time, I wasn’t enraged or saddened. For a moment, I was relieved and at peace within myself. For a split second, I smiled. Tears fell but, I smiled. I inhaled deeply and exhaled hard but, I smiled. I don’t know what occurred in that moment. Yet, I know something was released. A burden was taken off my spirit. A boulder was taken off my back. And, for a split second, I could breathe again. I could breathe, without you. And, for a split second, I smiled…because, I know that’s what you would’ve wanted for me. You would’ve wanted for me to be able to breathe, to move and live freely, to smile the biggest smiles and laugh as hard as possible. That was your prayer and dream for me. Yes, you’d want me to remember you but, not as I have. You would want me to keep all the good you’ve done while cherishing it and forget all of the bad. So, that’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to breathe for me and for you. I’m going to honor who you were. I’m going to remind others of the good you’ve done. I’m your wildest dream and the fulfillment of your mission on earth. And, for a split second, I smiled today. I was reminded of the love you had for me and remembered you as you were - my super hero and best friend, no matter where or how far apart we were…you were always right there, close. I miss you a lot, these days. I just hope you know, I love you, dad! I’m healing through the hurt and preparing through the pain. And, when this grief is over - I know I’ll make you proud of everything you sacrificed for me. Happy Father’s Day! 💜
Darling…Sometimes, I can’t stop these tears from falling from my eyes. No matter how much I try to fight it, this war within myself becomes exhausting and the only peace I feel is when these tears pour like rain. Honestly, I don’t know if I am losing or winning. I’m not certain if I’m doing what is right or wrong. Most of the time, I’m usually unsure about where I am, how I’m feeling, or what I’m doing. So, I cry. No questions or answers. I cry. No purpose or reason. I cry. No thought, memory, or influence. I cry. These tears down pour rivers and lakes. They flood the most beautiful places with oceanic streams. And, I am simply left blubbering like a fool. Widened red eyes, snotty nose, trembling hands, wet faced, and somehow…continously breaking and being rebuilt after every release. When I cry, something breaks inside of me. When I cry, something is also repaired. When I cry, I am released from what tries to hold me down. When I cry, I become free and experience a freedom no one can take away from me. So yeah, I cry. Sometimes a lot, sometimes a little bit. I know most people see it as a sign of weakness but, I see it as a sign of strength. I won’t stop these tears from falling from my eyes, sometimes you just can’t. Plus, I need them…
Darling, i’m unsure of how to let you go. There’s so much to unravel and sort through, you know? This has been a hell of a ride - on and off again, through the years. I love you. I hate you. I like you. I miss you. You have no idea how hard this is…how am I supposed to say goodbye? How am I supposed to let you go? How am I supposed to forget our love and all of the moments we’ve shared? Those feelings and memories never go away - they stay haunting, like a tormentor. Resurfacing every chance there is to remind me of what I’m missing. How am I supposed to pretend that I don’t miss you? That every day that I’m left alone - I’m still yearning for your touch, taste, smell, and tone. Feigning for you to simply walk through that door or be on the other end of my call…I can’t help but become undone just thinking about you. There’s not enough tears to wash away this pain or enough time to heal this wound. I’m longing for you. Wanting to be reunited with my love that was gone too soon. But, I dare not speak this aloud. I cry to God - praying for redos, miracles, and help through. And, put on a smile as I face every day as if you were still here beside me. I am unraveling as I sort through these emotions. These pictures hold so many memories - my years of mixed emotions - on again, off again moments through this hellish ride we call life. And beloved, there’s no other person I would’ve wanted to do it with but, you. I’m unsure of how to let go but, I love you, I hate you, I like you and I miss you too…